It is considered that a good man is hard to find, and, as a result, the divorce rate is very high. I think that there is a man for every single woman and there is a woman for every single man. Many single people have hope, but it is not enough. We should act.
Still single? Are you tired of being single? Don't know what is the reason of your singleness - why single? I try to answer your questions and help you get what you need.
Here I list the main reasons of being single for a long time, give solutions for changing your single life and meeting your soulmate. You will know is it ok to write to men first, what we can do to be more successful on the dating scene, especially if we're looking for serious relationship.
Single - 1st reason - Passivity
Some singles write me messages where they say it's very difficult to meet their match. I give one question to all of them:"How many messages did they send to their potential soulmate?" Most of them didn't write a message. Some of them wrote 1-3. The same mistake we sometimes make in the real life: in the street, in office, in the concerts etc. Shyness doesn't allow a girl to say a boy: "Hi, How are you?", "Would you like to have coffee some time?" or "Would you like to be my friend?", even when he stands near her. The typical thoughts-enemies of our success when meeting new people: "What will he say and think of me?", "Does he like me?", "Maybe he has a boyfriend", "He is so handsome, but I...", "He will don't speak to me". It's a clear picture of the passive wish: when we want something, but do nothing to make our dreams become true. Just waiting is not enough to get what we want! If everyone waits for incoming messages, then who will write?
When I was a young girl, I browsed through magazines and cut out images that represented my passions and goals, and sticked them to the wall. Every day I visualized my dreams, but nothing happened until one day I realized that I should do something to reach the goals. I ananlized the situation, made the plan and start working on my dreams. The daily practice of visualizing our dreams is one of the two important steps on the way to our goal. The second important step is action. Visualization creates circumstances, and our actions are the best ways to show our gratitude to God for his help.
There was a time when it was considered that a man should make the first move to relationship. But today demonstrates big changes. Women became more financially independent, have voice, right to economic equality and independence, can handle their lives on their own and decide what is good or bad for them. At the same time, there are women who stick to the old rules - they are waiting for men to write them first. A successful person lives according to rules of his time. Dear women, I love you all and want to see your happy smiles. I know that you really want to meet a man for love and creating a family. Then STOP waiting, START acting! Take the first step to your happiness! Never give up! It's not easy, but it works. Register a profile on the dating site, for example, at MeetingLand.com, make search and write first messages to single men. Be confident and believe there is a good man for you in this world.
Some women ask me: "Are men feel comfortable when women sending introductory messages to them?" I quizzed single men from Meeting Land and all of them said they like when a woman takes the initiative. Being a first can be difficult, but it gives us a bonus, more opportunities, choice and a real chance to meet a man we need.
A small example from my own experience. When I was a student, I met a boy. I liked him, not loved. It was interesting to talk to him and travel together along the streets. He called me up once - we went for a walk, he called me up a second time - we spend a good day together again. Suddenly he stoped calling. I couldn't understand why he disappeared. At that time I considered that a man should invite a girl on a date, that is why I was waiting for his call. Then I stoped waiting and decided that he had no interest in our further communication. Months passed. I met another boy who became my life partner. I love him and feel myself happy. An interesting thing is the following: when I met my first boy-friend and said him that I had met my love and we were planning our marriage, he was shocked, he made a declaration of love and said how much he needed me. I wondered why he hadn't phoned me up. He said he had been waiting for my call, because he wanted to be sure I liked him.
So, a good solution to get rid of your single life is to act - to write messages. Make the first step and the second one if needed.
Single - 2nd reason - Puting distance borders
There are men and women who are looking just for local singles. It's a good idea to look for your soulmate in you native city, but your mate may live in another region. If "meet local" doesn't work for you for a long time, may be it's a red flag to expand borders of your Search. If you insist on the city where you live and categorically refuse to look for a mate outside, the chances to create happy relationship are gradually decreasing. In the usual situation, you will choose the best one from those singles who live near you. Your new boyfriend or girlfriend can be a good person and have good personality traits, but they will not work for you so that to make you feel happy. You see, there is a good information to think about.
Single - 3rd reason - Mrs or Mr Right
I talked to many single women and men on the dating site and got the sense that there are people who unwilling to communicate and even date unless they are 100% convinced a person is Mr or Mrs Right. They don't reply to incoming messages if a new friend is a bit different from the one they are dreaming about. Each of us try to be better, but we are on the way of self-improving all our life. That is why, there are no ideal people. I think that online correspondence is a good filter to get rid of those who:
don't reply to our main requirement - our goal, for example, serious relationship;
totally don't attract us (view photo);
don't share our main values;
If everything with above things is ok, then we can move to the first date.
Single - 4th reason - "Poor" dating profiles
Those dating profiles where there is a lack of information about a single's personality type and about people a person is looking for.
Right profile is your opportunity to stand out from thousands of other singles and your chance to attract your mate. If you are serious about relationship you're seeking, then you have to think it over and do your best to create a profile that will shine like a bright star in the sky, attracting maximum attention. You need to spark the interest of a single guy and his wish to write you a first message.
In fact writing an online dating profile can be very interesting and exciting process. Having self-confidence and a strong faith in a successful result (sooner or later) will help you relax and put your best traits on the paper. When I was a young girl I decided, that I will better be a single than with a person I don't love. I was sure that there was a man for me - my mate, I just didn't know the time of the first meeting. One day I met him.
A few words about writing the dating profile:
Don't care about dating profiles of the other beautiful girls, "dating competition", and about your chances to get a man of your dreams, to meet a special someone; take one step at a time - now you're thinking about yourself, your potential boyfriend and mutual relationships. Each of us is unique in one's own way. We know about our best traits of character from our own experience and from other people. Tell single men at MeetingLand about you. Let them know you're one of the best flowers in the world.
Be honest. Common mistakes some women make: *put an old photo (taken over 8 years ago), *write N pounds less than they are, Such lie reveals itself during the first date, the moment you meet.
*Tell they are single and seeking love, but in fact they are "attached" to their ex-boy (can't get him out of their mind). Time is a healer. But if you feel nothing to your future husband, if you marry your boyfriend just to avoid loneliness or to get a marital status, you will feel lack of happiness every day, and, as a result, one day you may feel depressed, lonely and ragged. Think it through. You are worthy of the better life - happy family relationship.
Strong relationships are build on trust and honesty. False relationships are built on illusion and lie, usually such relationship don't make people happy.
Be real in your profile, but highlight things you like. By giving more details of what you like, you are receiving more "points" for your personality and becoming more attractive to men. It's ok to say about things you don't like, but don’t complain about your life, your ex-boyfriend etc. Also, avoid angry words. Otherwise men will consider you a hard girl for relationship and pass by your profile.
Single - 5th reason - Careless
There are single people who spend much time on creating a dating profile, placing it on the dating sites, and writing emails, but in a short period of time they forget about their goal because of different daily reasons, and don't check Inbox for months. Their "potential" soulmates write them replies, but don't receive answers; as a result, they think that they are not attractive, delete their profiles and get depressed.
We are responsible for our actions!
Single - 6th reason - Too short introduction message.
Single - 7th reason - Bad photo
Single - 8th reason - There are people who have their own view about spamming. For example, some members of the dating site consider the 1st - 5th incoming messages a spam if there is an email there. And they will not reply to those messages.
That is why, if you're serious about dating or meeting someone for friendship and love, don't send your email in your initial messages to other members. Otherwise, you risk to stay single and think nobody like you. We provide a comfortable environment at MeetingLand. This way, you can communicate privately; the person receiving the message will not see your email address, just your username. Take your time, there are so many useful and interesting things to talk about. If you want to exchange emails or any other personal contacts, then wait until:
you're sure the other member (a man or a woman) is honesty,
you have a wish to meet them in person,
you want to phone them to hear their voice and get to know them,
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